Endings and Beginnings Read online

  “I know I hurt you, and I am so very sorry. Trust is something I don’t seem to have a great abundance of, but I think, with your help, I’m finally willing to try again. If you’ll promise to stand by me the whole way.”

  Darren regarded him in silence before cupping his cheek and drawing him nearer into a soft kiss. “I will always be by your side,” Darren promised. “We’re going to get through this, and when we come out the other side, we’re going to find our bond is even stronger than before. I know this, because like I promised your mum, I’m going to take care of you. It’s my job and my pleasure.”

  JJ’s heart soared to hear the sincerity and love in Darren’s voice. “You really mean that, don’t you?”

  Darren met his gaze. “More than you could possibly imagine. I can’t tell you what joy you bring to my life, you know. Being with you amazes me every day. And punishing you? That’s going to be a whole new—and completely different—kind of joy. I love you, boy.”

  JJ melted. “And I love you, Sir.” He leaned forward and kissed Darren on the lips.

  He’d meant to keep it chaste, but Darren’s low moan encouraged him to deepen it, until Darren’s hands were in his hair and he was pressed up against Darren’s bare chest. JJ broke the kiss and tried to regain his composure.

  “You… you still haven’t told me what my punishment is to be.”

  Darren smiled. “Damn. I wanted to punish you tonight, but after that kiss? I’m more in the mood to take you in my arms and—”

  “And take me?” JJ whispered, suddenly aware of Darren’s dick rubbing against his own.

  Darren groaned. “God, you’re such a temptation. Okay, Saturday morning, you have a date with some eighties music and whatever exercise I can come up with.”

  JJ gave him a pained look. “Eighties music?” he exclaimed in mock horror. “Talk about a cruel punishment.”

  Darren laughed, and the sound delighted him. But then the laughter faded.

  “What was that about me taking you?” Darren said hoarsely, pushing up with his hips.

  “Wait… wait a minute.” Damn. Darren scrambled his brain. “You asked me what I was thinking about a moment ago, and as it happens it was something important.” His heartbeat raced, but he’d been considering bringing up the subject ever since that scene at the club when Darren’s dirty talk had set a whole new train of thought in motion.

  Darren stilled instantly. “What is it?”

  It had been easier when he’d played out the conversation in his head. “When you were doing your best to turn me into a quivering pile of jelly a few weeks back, you know….”

  Darren grinned. “Like I could forget.” He ground their cocks together.

  “Down, boy. I mean it. This is important.”

  Something in his expression apparently got through. Darren lay still. “I’m listening. And yes, I remember.”

  JJ drew in a deep breath. “One of the things you said got me thinking. How… how would you feel if we… went bare?” He locked gazes. “You and me. Exclusive. Ditch the condoms.”

  “Want to tell me why now?” Darren said quietly. “Not that I’m saying no, you understand, but I want to hear your thoughts on this.” He placed his hands on JJ’s waist, his thumbs rubbing in circles. “This is pretty big, baby.”

  Baby. God, that sounded good. JJ nodded. “I know. The weird thing is, after my first time, I swore I would never trust anyone enough to not insist on a condom. But… well… I never thought I’d meet anyone like you. Someone who didn’t insist on me trusting him, but who I’m walking side by side with as we build trust together. I know Thomas said that trust will be broken many times in a relationship, but I’m willing to take the chance that we’ll make it stronger each time, because we’ll be together.” He paused to take a breath, aware of the knots of nervous tension in his belly.

  Darren regarded him quietly for a moment before pulling JJ to him. “Thank you. I know you don’t trust easily. I’m also aware you probably never will. But the fact that you’re willing to trust in us means the world to me. I’ve never gone bareback before, and if I’m honest, it’s for the same reasons as you. I didn’t trust anyone. But you, I trust. You, I love.”

  “Then you’re okay if we….”

  Darren stretched out on his back, tugging JJ to lie beside him, his arm around him. “We’ve been tested. We’re both negative. And we’re committed to each other.” He smiled. “It doesn’t get more exclusive than that.” He lifted JJ’s chin to look him in the eye. “So yes, I want this too.”

  A feeling of peace, of… rightness, spread out from JJ’s core. “What you do to me,” he sighed, rubbing his fingers through the hair on Darren’s chest. “I think back to how I used to feel about sex before I met you. There’s no comparison with how I feel now.” He chuckled. “Have you any idea how much time we spend fucking?”

  Darren put a finger to his lips. “Right now I’m not in the mood for a quick fuck before we sleep.” His eyes shone in the lamplight. “I want to make love with my lover. I want to take my time and enjoy that moment when I get to feel you around my cock, with nothing between us.”

  Oh God, yes.

  JJ shifted up the bed until his head was level with Darren’s. “Yes. Make love to me.” He stroked Darren’s jaw and moved in to kiss him, sucking in his lower lip and sliding his hand to caress the warm flesh of his neck. Darren sighed and slowly pushed his tongue between JJ’s lips, JJ opening for him instantly. Darren cupped the back of his head and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss. JJ lost himself in the intimacy of the moment: Darren’s lips, so warm against his forehead, cheeks, his chin; the feel of his hand on JJ’s head, his touch firm but gentle; the musky scent that seeped into his consciousness, pervading his senses.

  The depth of their connection left him trembling.

  “Love you,” he whispered.

  Darren’s face lit up. “I love you too.” He laughed shakily. “God, I feel like I could do anything right now.”

  “Yeah?” JJ reached lower until his fingers met the head of Darren’s erect dick. “I have an idea what you can do with this.” He grinned. “Maybe I should go down and say hello.”

  DARREN SNORTED. “Go down…. Witty man.” Then all such thoughts vanished as JJ began to kiss a path down his body, taking his time, his hand wrapped around Darren’s cock while he gently stroked up and down its length. “God, yes,” he whispered urgently.

  JJ chuckled against his belly. “Patience, Mr. Big Bad Dom. Patience, remember?”

  Any retort on his lips died as JJ slowly lapped the precome from his slit before taking him into his mouth. Darren shuddered at the sensation, and JJ pulled free, kissing the tip of his cock. He moved back up the bed and kissed Darren on the lips.

  “Your dick likes me,” he said with a grin.

  “My dick has good taste, that’s why,” he replied, and then they were right back to kissing, touching, caressing, JJ’s hand still working his cock in a lazy stroke. Darren kissed down his neck and over his collarbones, heading for the hotspot he knew would send waves of pleasure through his lover. He bathed JJ’s nipple with his tongue, and the groan that rumbled from JJ’s chest was gratifying. “Can’t wait until these are healed and I can play with them.”

  “Oh fuck, me too,” JJ moaned. He rolled onto his side, taking Darren with him, and Darren held him with one arm around his shoulders, the other slowly stroking along his back, edging lower to the curve of his arse. Darren rubbed and squeezed his arsecheek, his fingers moving closer to JJ’s crease. “Yes,” JJ urged him, his breathing speeding up.

  “Not… not yet.” Darren shifted his hand, wrapping his arms around JJ’s back, pulling him closer. He groaned when JJ began kissing his neck, licking and sucking down to the shoulder. “You fight dirty. You know I… love it when… you do that.”

  JJ chuckled against his neck. “You’re still talking, so I can’t be doing it right.” He lifted his head to bring their lips together.

  Darren moaned
into the kiss. “You feel so good.”

  JJ put his arm around Darren’s neck. “You too.” They kissed, the passion building between them, until JJ was rocking against him, their dicks sliding over each other. JJ shifted to lie on top of him, grinding their dicks together, hips rolling, their kisses more heated, their low moans and cries constant.

  Darren grabbed JJ around the waist and tugged him higher up his body, hands cupping his arse while he kissed JJ’s neck and chest. JJ buried his face in Darren’s neck while he reached lower to rub over his hole. “Yes,” JJ whispered when Darren slowly pushed a finger inside him. He began to rock, forcing Darren’s finger deeper into him, his moans increasing in number and volume.

  “Kneel up over my face,” Darren said breathlessly. “I want to get you ready for me.” He slid farther down the bed.

  JJ nodded and straddled his head, holding on to the headboard. Darren pulled his cheeks apart to reveal that tight pucker. He grinned.

  “You have a beautiful hole.” He grabbed hold of JJ’s hips and pulled him down until Darren’s face was buried between his cheeks, his tongue pushing insistently to gain entrance. JJ groaned as Darren loosened him with his tongue, still rolling his hips. Darren reached up and slid his thumb into JJ’s hot body, alternating with his tongue until JJ was almost sobbing with need.

  JJ raised himself up on his knees. “Now? Please?”

  “Get the lube,” Darren told him, and JJ scrambled off him to pull open the bedside drawer. “You’re going to ride me.”

  JJ got astride him, and Darren tilted his hips, letting his cock slide through JJ’s crease, rubbing over his hole. JJ stared down at him, lips parted. “God, you’re hard.”

  Darren slicked up his fingers and swiped them over his dick. “That’s because all I can think of right now is that I’m about to slide into you bare.”

  Their gazes locked. “Do it,” JJ whispered, reaching behind to take hold of Darren’s slippery shaft. He positioned the head against his hole, and slowly, so slowly, Darren entered him.

  “Holy fuck,” he gasped. “The feel of you on my cock, so hot….” He grabbed JJ’s arse and spread him, rocking up into him. JJ leaned down and kissed him, his breathing harsh as he fed low moans of pleasure into Darren’s mouth. Darren wrapped his arms around JJ’s waist and held on to him while he rocked faster, sliding deeper into him.

  It wasn’t enough.

  He grabbed JJ’s shoulders, anchoring him while he fucked into him, their faces inches from each other, their breath mingling, focused on each other.

  “Oh God, yes, just like that,” JJ groaned, pushing down hard, forcing Darren deeper into him. He pulled himself upright and began to ride, hips rolling, his cock rubbing against Darren’s abs. Darren slipped his hands beneath JJ’s arse, supporting JJ as he bounced on his dick, crying out each time he slid all the way into him. He grabbed JJ’s hands and held them on either side of Darren’s head, their fingers laced as he slammed up into him, their bodies slapping together.

  “S-slow it down,” JJ begged. “I want it to last.”

  Darren nodded and let go of his hands. JJ leaned back and rocked slowly, his hips rolling fluidly, his body undulating as he rode Darren’s cock. JJ threw back his head and gasped. “Fuck, yes, like that.” He twisted, looking over his shoulder, and growled. “That’s it. We need mirrors in here. Lots of mirrors. I want to watch you take me, no matter what position you’ve got me in.”

  “The things you say,” Darren said, his eyes wide.

  JJ rolled his hips, taking him deeper. “What? What’s wrong with wanting to watch my lover’s cock sliding into my hole? Watching you fuck me, your dick spreading me wide, stretching me….” His upper body was covered with a fine sheen of sweat, his dick hard as it fucked his fist.

  “God, look at you.” Darren pulled him down into a heated kiss. “Want you on your back, baby.”

  “Stay in me,” JJ pleaded.

  Darren held on tight while he flipped them, his cock still deep inside JJ, and then hooked JJ’s legs over his arms. He braced himself, elbows locked, and began to slide in and out of him, slowly at first but gaining momentum. JJ held on to his shoulders with one hand, the other around his dick, his eyes fixed on Darren, his chest rising and falling.

  Darren bent down to kiss him, then kissed his neck. “Going to come soon,” he whispered.

  “Come inside me,” JJ gasped. “I want to feel you.”

  Darren nodded and began to pick up the pace, JJ moving with him, his arms around Darren, legs around his waist. Darren let himself go, thrusting deep, hips snapping as his orgasm approached. JJ clung to him, fingers digging in, his body clamping down on Darren’s dick.

  “Oh God,” Darren cried out as he came, filling JJ with heat. He pushed as far as he could go, his cock throbbing inside JJ’s channel. He bowed his head, breathing rapidly, his shaft imprisoned in a soft, hot prison.

  “Fuck, how that feels,” JJ moaned. He let go of Darren’s shoulder and grasped his cock just as it erupted between their bodies. A shudder coursed through him, and he opened his eyes wide. “That felt so good.”

  Darren lowered his body onto JJ’s and kissed him, his heartbeat returning to normal. He gazed into JJ’s eyes. “Love you.”

  JJ cupped his nape and pulled him into a kiss. “Love you too,” he whispered. His face fell. “We can’t stay like this, can we?”

  Darren laughed softly. “Not if we want to get some sleep tonight. We both have work tomorrow.” Slowly he eased out of JJ, his softened cock glistening with his spunk.

  JJ reached between his legs and pushed a finger into his hole. “Oh wow,” he said softly. “I’m full of your come.”

  Darren sat back and gazed at the slightly swollen hole. “Not anymore,” he said with a smile. “You’re now leaking over the sheets.” His gaze met JJ’s. “I knew I should have kept my plug handy, like I suggested.” He lay down next to JJ and pulled him close. “I have to admit, that was different.”

  JJ nodded, molding his body to Darren’s. “A good different?”

  Darren smiled. “A very good different.” He gazed down at their bodies. “Although a shower might be in order before we fall asleep.”

  JJ grinned. “Want to conserve water?”

  “Of course.” Darren sat up and glanced at the bed. “Just so we’re clear. You’re the sub, so you know what that means, right?”

  JJ frowned. “What?”

  “You’re sleeping on the side with the wet spot.”

  Darren had no idea he could move that fast when he had to.

  Chapter Thirty

  HIS DAY off was not putting Pietro in a good mood. In fact, that was part of the problem. He had a day to himself and no Miles. What pissed him off even more was that Miles had planned to spend the whole day with him and had cried off at the last minute. Something about a meeting with a nervous bride to be and her fiancé, who were panicking about their upcoming wedding and were insisting on going through all the layouts they wanted for the big day. Miles had grumped about it, but business was business.

  “You shouldn’t be such a kickass photographer. Then you wouldn’t be in such demand,” Pietro had teased him. Still, he was so proud of his lover and Dom. The business was really taking off.

  Another thorn in Pietro’s side was Melissa. After all the help they’d been to her, finding her that beautiful house, there hadn’t been one invitation to come visit. Apparently, as soon as she’d seen Miles’s photos of the place, she’d got on the phone that second to call the estate agent to organize a viewing for herself. An hour after seeing the house, she’d put in an offer, and everything had gone through so freaking fast after that. The owner had stipulated that they wanted a quick sale, and the whole process had taken a month. Pietro had volunteered to help with the moving, but she’d called him to say she had everything under control.

  So what with Miles abandoning him and Melissa cutting him out, Pietro was feeling pretty much unwanted. He’d done the food shopping, cleaned the
flat from top to bottom until it sparkled, and was debating going into work to relieve the boredom when his phone rang.

  “I need help,” Miles said, his breath ragged. “Melissa says there’s something wrong at the house. Can you come along? Please?”

  The note of panic in Miles’s voice had Pietro instantly alert. “Yes, of course.” So much for my day being boring.

  “I’m five minutes from you. I’ll meet you at the main door to your building,” Miles informed him and disconnected.

  Pietro grabbed his jacket and keys, so many thoughts rampaging through his head. Had someone been hurt? Had Melissa burned the place down because she’d set fire to something in the kitchen? Okay, that last one was extreme, but God, he hated not knowing. He locked up the flat, ran downstairs, and exited the block of flats, scanning the road for any sign of Miles. When he saw the silver SUV driving down the street, he went to meet it at the curb. He climbed in and strapped on the seat belt.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked, glancing at Miles, who seemed to be dealing better with his agitation.

  Miles stared out the windscreen. “She wouldn’t say. She just said we needed to come right away.” He snuck a quick look at Pietro and smiled. “Thank you for doing this.”

  For some reason, Miles’s gratitude rankled. Even though Pietro was upset that they still lived apart, how could Miles think he wouldn’t drop everything for him?

  The drive seemed to take forever. Considering the circumstances, Miles seemed to be on a go-slow. Pietro tapped his fingers against the center console, but Miles didn’t appear to notice.

  When they pulled in front of the house, there were no lights on and no cars in the driveway. That was enough to set Pietro’s heart racing. He leaped out of the car and ran for the door.

  “Pietro!” Miles called, bringing him up short. “Wait for me.”

  “Come on, then,” Pietro shouted, worry gnawing at his insides. “This is freaking me out.”