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Personal Challenges Page 4


  “Hey, wow. This is a surprise.”

  Ray chuckled. “Yeah, though I suspect it’s more of a shock after all this time.”

  That was the truth. “How did you find this number?” Colin had told him of the move to London when he’d gotten his present job, about eight years ago, but hadn’t gone into details. He wasn’t even sure he possessed Ray’s phone number: Ray certainly didn’t have his. And it’s not like he ever asked me for it. Exchanging cards with his ex after all these years was strange enough.

  “It wasn’t easy. I’ve been looking online for nearly six months. It was only finding a photo of your company last month that gave me a break. You’d won some award or other.”

  “Oh, when we won the RIBA Regional award last year?” Winning an award from the Royal Institute of British Architects had been the company’s crowning achievement. “Yes, that was amazing.” He paused for a minute. “Is there a particular reason why you wanted to talk to me? I mean, it’s been a while.” He chuckled. “Unless it was something you couldn’t write in a Christmas card.”

  “I was thinking about you yesterday.” Ray’s voice softened.

  “Oh?” It took a second or two for Colin to realize why. “Oh. Right.” Their first date had been Valentine’s day, 2000.

  “You remember, then.”

  Colin smiled. “As first dates go, it was pretty memorable.” Ray had taken him to the Curry Mile in Rusholme, to a popular Indian restaurant.

  Ray snorted. “That’s putting it mildly. How many days of lectures did you miss because of food poisoning? I’m still amazed that you went out with me again after that.”

  “It wouldn’t surprise you to know that I’ve never eaten that dish since.”

  Ray laughed, but ended abruptly when he started coughing, a deep, hacking cough that went on for several seconds.

  “Oh, that doesn’t sound good.” Colin knew there was a nasty bout of flu making the rounds.

  “Yeah, well, I’ll get over it.”

  Something he’d said jarred in Colin’s mind. “You said you’ve been trying to find a number for me for six months? Why didn’t you just write to me and ask me for it? You know where I live, after all.”

  “I wanted to surprise you.”

  “Well, you certainly did that. Are you still lecturing?”

  Ray cleared his throat. “No, I took early retirement.”

  “Oh, a man of leisure. Nice. What are you finding to do with all that time you now have?”

  The pause that followed Colin’s words stretched to more than ten seconds. “Ray? You still there?”

  “Sorry, I got distracted for a moment. Look, something’s just come up, and I’ll have to finish this call. Another time?”

  “Sure.” Colin had an uneasy feeling in his gut and he had no idea why. “Listen, why don’t I give you my mobile number?”

  “That sounds like a good idea. Maybe—if you don’t mind, that is—I could have your e-mail address too?”

  Colin blinked. “Sure. No problem.” He rattled off the number and address, and then repeated them. “Thanks for calling.”

  “It was good to hear your voice after all this time.” Sincerity rang through Ray’s words.

  Colin’s belly clenched. “Same here. Get rid of that cough.”

  Ray chuckled. “You haven’t changed a bit. Still trying to take care of me.” Before Colin could reply, he’d disconnected the call.

  Colin placed the phone on his desk and stared at it. Okay, that was… weird. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but something had felt off. It wasn’t until he was on his way to the staff kitchen to heat up his soup that he realized Ray hadn’t given him his number. I should have asked him for it. Then he reflected. Why would I want to call him? Their relationship had been over a long time, and he wasn’t sure it was such a good thing to rake up the past.

  Especially if that call was anything to go by. A couple of minutes talking to Ray and Colin’s stomach was churning.

  * * * * * *

  By the time Colin had dried the dishes and put them away, Ed had come to a decision. He couldn’t let the evening continue without saying something.

  “So, you gonna tell me what’s on yer mind?” The second the words had left his lips, he berated himself for their lack of tact. Colin often told him it was an endearing quality, Ed’s habit of speaking his thoughts out loud, unfiltered.

  What he means is, I’m blunt. It wasn’t as if Ed was about to change. He was too long in the tooth for that.

  Colin merely arched his eyebrows. “What makes you think there’s something on my mind?” He poured himself another glass of wine.

  Ed pointed to the bottle and snorted. “One, I know ya, an’ two, since when do you have more than two glasses of wine of an evenin’?”

  Colin smiled. “I didn’t realize I was such a creature of habit.” He held up the bottle. “Do you want the last bit?”

  Ed grinned. “Thought you’d never ask.”

  Colin poured out the last of the wine and handed him the glass. Ed followed him into the lounge and joined him on the couch, displacing Tigger, who leaped off and went into the kitchen, presumably in search of more food. That cat is gettin’ to be a little fatty. His attention was diverted when he observed the slight furrowing of Colin’s brow, the tightness around his mouth. “Okay, out with it.”

  Colin took a sip of wine and sighed. “It’s probably nothing.”

  “Let me be the judge of that.” The tension Ed had felt for the last hour or so dissipated at Colin’s words. That’s it, love. Tell me. He didn’t push, however. It was enough that Colin was prepared to discuss whatever was occupying his thoughts.

  “You remember our first Christmas together, when I received a card from someone called Ray, and you asked me who that was?”

  Ed frowned. “Yeah. A uni mate, wasn’t he? He always sends you a card.”

  Colin nodded. “Well, he called me at work today, out of the blue.”

  When nothing else was forthcoming, Ed put down his wine glass and stared at his lover. “And? Why should that get your knickers in a twist?”

  Colin chuckled, exactly the reaction Ed had wanted to provoke. “You have a lovely turn of phrase, do you know that?”

  Ed preened, knowing it would make him smile. “Yep. It’s part of me charm. Now talk to me.”

  Colin took another drink and then put down his glass. “What I told you about Ray wasn’t strictly true. We did meet at university, yes, but…” His gaze met Ed’s. “He was my first.”

  “An’ he still sends you Christmas cards? Friendly bloke.” Ed wasn’t bothered by that. He knew with all his heart that the love he and Colin shared was solid to the core.

  Colin laughed. “That’s one way of putting it, I suppose. I’m still surprised that he keeps on sending them, to be honest. But as long as he does, I’ll send one in return.” He glanced down to where his hands lay clasped in his lap. “The thing is, we weren’t your typical boyfriends.”

  Now that got Ed’s attention. “Oh? Tell me more.” What intrigued him was the fact that Colin couldn’t look him in the eye. Just who is this Ray bloke?

  Colin cleared his throat. “He was… one of the lecturers.”

  Ed gaped. “You were ’avin’ it off with a lecturer? You dirty little git.”

  Colin jerked his head up. “Excuse me?” His mouth fell open.

  Ed snickered. “No, seriously, I’m impressed. ’Ow old were ya? Eighteen, nineteen?” He waggled his eyebrows. “Got a thing for older guys, ’ave ya? Not that I can talk, me bein’ a cradle snatcher.”

  Colin gave him an amused glance. “You are only five years older than me, mister.”

  Ed laughed. “Well, don’t stop there. Tell me about you an’ Ray. ’Ow did you manage to keep that a secret? ’Cause I don’t imagine that’s the sort of thing he’d ’ave liked spread around, know what I mean?” He winked.

  Colin groaned. “You have no idea. It helped that he wasn’t one of my lecturers.”


  Ed shrugged. “Okay. Not so bad then, I suppose. I ’ad visions of your eyes meetin’ across a crowded lecture ’all, you passin’ notes to each other with your assignments, that sort of thing.” It was a side to Colin he hadn’t expected.

  Colin chuckled. “Nothing quite so romantic. I ran into him in a gay bar near Canal Street. I’d seen him around campus so I knew straight away who he was. We met there a few times before he asked me out.”

  “’Ow long were you together?”

  “Just over three years. When I was in my final year, he was offered a position at the University of Edinburgh. It was too good an opportunity to miss. He left at the end of the summer and that was the last I saw of him.”

  “Did you part on good terms?” Ed noted Colin’s wistful expression. It was obvious Ray had meant a lot to him.

  There was a pause before Colin nodded. “What we had was good, but you know what they say. All good things must come to an end. I guess he spoiled me for other men, though. All the guys who came after him just didn’t measure up. It wasn’t until four years later that I met someone who became part of my life, and you already know about him.”

  Ed cast his mind back to when they’d first met. “Oh yeah. Matt.” The little shit that had tried to get back with Colin. He pushed the thought aside. That was ancient history. “So he called ya? Why?”

  Colin sighed and reached for his wine glass. “That’s what’s puzzling me. I don’t know. I get the impression he wanted to say more, but maybe lost his nerve. All I know is he ended the call pretty swiftly. He did want my number and e-mail address though.” He gave a shrug. “Maybe he’ll be in touch.”

  Ed shifted closer until his thigh was touching Colin’s. “So,” he began, his voice softer, “he was your first, eh?”

  Colin slowly turned his head. “I know that tone of voice. It gets all deep and seductive when you start thinking with your dick.”

  Ed gave a theatrical gasp. “I ’ave no idea what you’re talkin’ about.” He grinned. “It just got me thinkin’ about our first time, that’s all.”

  Colin laughed. “Believe me, the two experiences were nothing alike.” He stroked Ed’s thigh. “I had to ply you with alcohol to get you to relax, and your heart was pounding like a frightened rabbit’s until I got you to calm down.”

  Ed snorted. “Calm down? You rimmed me almost to the point of comin’.” Colin burst into laughter, and Ed joined in. “I was putty in your ’ands after that.” He cocked his head to one side. “So ’ow was your first time all that different?”

  Colin snickered. “Both Ray and I were horny as hell, impatient to get each other’s clothes off. I could hardly wait to get inside him, and when he got close, he made me pull out before he put on a condom and fucked me.”

  “What—you did each other? The first time?”

  Colin arched his eyebrows. “Don’t tell me you’re not familiar with the concept of a flip-fuck, Mr. Fellows. I’ve seen your browsing history, remember?” He smirked.

  Ed gave him a hard stare. “There is nothin’ wrong with watchin’ porn.” He grinned. “We’ve ’ad some very nice times after I’ve been, ’ow shall I put this, ‘inspired’?” Just thinking about him and Colin taking turns with each other was making him hard. Very hard.

  “Not disputing that for an instant,” Colin replied quickly. “I’m just pointing out that your surprise is all an act.” Casually he reached across to where Ed’s erection was making its presence known, and cupped his hand over the bulge. “And this tells me we have better things to do than sit here and talk about my ex.”

  For a brief moment it occurred to Ed that Colin was avoiding talking about Ray, but the thought didn’t stay long, not while Colin was paying such welcome attention to his stiff dick.

  “Then let’s not waste any more time,” Ed ground out. “Get that fine arse of yours into the bedroom.”

  He had plans for that arse.

  * * * * * *

  “I could kiss you all night,” Ed murmured against Colin’s lips, his hands cupping the face he loved with every cell, nerve and fibre of his being. Beneath him, Colin sighed and wrapped his legs tighter around Ed’s body, pulling him in even closer.

  So close, our souls are touching.

  The thought shook him. Ed had never been one for such profound contemplation, but being with Colin had changed him. After a string of unsuccessful dates with women, each one more deeply unsatisfying than the last, it had taken one man walking into his life to show him what love was really like. Ed wouldn’t change one iota of their life together.

  “That’s not all you could do all night,” Colin said with a chuckle.

  Ed stared at him. “And what does that mean?”

  Colin reached up to curve his palm around Ed’s cheek. “Know what I love about you? Your staying power. I’ve lost count of how many nights we’ve made love where you went for hours without coming. It’s actually incredible. I don’t know how you do it.”

  “You’d laugh if I told ya.”

  “Let me guess. You think about your parents having sex.” Colin grinned.

  Ed laughed. “Ooh, close but no cigar. No, I think about your parents havin’ sex.”

  “Ew. That’s just… wrong.”

  Ed raised his eyebrows and rolled off Colin to lie at his side. “Why? I’ve never met ’em. ’Ave you any idea how much concentration it takes to try an’ imagine two people who look like you? It keeps the mind occupied, I can tell ya.” He rubbed Colin’s belly. “So, you like me stamina, eh?”

  Colin covered Ed’s hand with his own. “Love it. You know we were talking about Ray earlier? That man couldn’t last more than half an hour. In comparison? You are a god.”

  Ed laughed softly. “An’ you, flatterer, are after something.”

  Colin’s eyes gleamed. “Damn. You’ve seen through my dastardly plan.” Slowly he rolled onto his belly and leisurely spread his legs wide, tilting his arse higher. His breathing quickened.

  Like Ed could turn down the opportunity to tongue-fuck that tight hole.

  He knelt up at Colin’s side, stroking the firm globes. “Look at you,” he whispered. “Lyin’ there, waitin’ for me.”

  Colin reached back and pulled his cheeks apart. “You like what you see?”

  Ed grinned. “On your ’ands an’ knees. I wanna worship this arse.”

  Colin did as instructed, and Ed leaned over to lick a path down his crack, blowing gently over Colin’s hole, watching as it tightened. He smiled to himself. “You love it when I do this.”

  “God, yes.” The pillow muffled Colin’s reply, but Ed caught it. He pressed his face between Colin’s cheeks and rubbed his bearded chin over the puckered entrance. Colin’s soft moan sent the blood rushing to his cock, making it heavy and full.

  He pulled the cheeks further apart, stretching Colin’s hole, presenting an image so tempting that he couldn’t resist. He pushed his tongue inside the loosened ring of muscle, before kissing his hole and licking over it slowly, feeling the tremors that rippled through Colin’s body. Ed licked his way down the trench lined with dark blond hair, so dark it was almost brown. He loved the forest of long hair that encircled the hole, the pinkness of the delicate skin when stretched, the way it glistened with his spit. Ed rubbed over it with his thumb, pausing for a moment to push it inside, before withdrawing it and going right back to licking and sucking him there.

  “Fuck.” Colin’s voice was dimmed by the pillow, yet it was still a sound rich in awe.

  “Later,” Ed said with a chuckle. “I’m ’avin’ way too much fun makin’ your body dance on me tongue. My cock will get its turn later.” He smacked Colin’s arse, the sound loud and sharp. “God, I love yer arse. Y’know, you ’ave the arse of a much younger man.”

  Colin lifted his head from his nest of pillows to stare over his shoulder at Ed. “And just how many younger men’s arses have you seen lately?” Before Ed could come back with a witty retort, Colin groaned. “And we’re back to porn.”


  Ed smacked him again. “Shut it. I’m enjoyin’ meself.” He stretched Colin’s hole wide again and penetrated it with his tongue, pushing as deep as he could go. When it dripped with saliva, he slowly sank his finger deep into Colin’s arse, marvelling at the heat that surrounded it, the softness of the channel that sucked him in, the way Colin rocked back to take more of him inside. Then Ed pulled free and pressed his face into the crease once again, bobbing his head to rub his face over Colin’s hole, breathing in the rich, male scent, feeling the warm skin of his arse beneath his fingertips.

  Colin groaned and knelt up. “Lie down on your back,” he growled.

  Ed didn’t hesitate. He lay down and Colin squatted over his face, spreading his cheeks to show Ed his prize. Ed tugged him lower and began to tongue-fuck his arse in earnest, Colin writhing above him, low cries and moans pouring from him. Ed dug his fingers into Colin’s hips, holding him steady while he probed him again and again with his tongue. When he felt the warm spatter of come on his chest and belly, it made Ed’s heart soar. Colin shifted forward and scooping up his load, smeared it over Ed’s rigid cock and guided it to his hole.

  Ed thrust up into him, filling him to the hilt in one long, hot glide of flesh into heated flesh. The sight of his thick dick sliding in and out of Colin’s body sent tingles through him, a burst of electricity down his spine and straight into his balls.

  “Sorry, Col,” he gasped. “Not gonna be… one of those nights… where I fuck you for hours.”

  Colin swivelled around, Ed’s dick still inside him, and bent over to kiss him, hands stroking Ed’s furred chest. “Don’t care,” he whispered. “Just want to feel you coming inside me.”

  Ed nodded and proceeded to fuck him, rocking up off the bed to thrust into him while they kissed, feeding each other sighs, grunts and gasps. Colin moaned every time Ed’s dick slid over his gland, and the sounds only served to bring his desire and need to boiling point. He wrapped his arms around Colin and held him tight while he pistoned in and out of that hot hole, pumping into him, feeling Colin’s channel cling to his shaft.