An Unlocked Mind Read online

  He drove on, trying not to stare at the rearview mirror. Except the kid was like a magnet, pulling his gaze from the road. Vic kept the car moving at a slow pace. Still the young man trudged on, though each step seemed to be slower than the last. Vic wasn’t certain why he cared. The little shit had been obnoxious, and Vic didn’t have time to play nursemaid. But he couldn’t shake the kid’s expression from his mind. He’d seemed so lost, defeated and alone, and it called to the Dom in Vic. He’d been in the lifestyle long enough to know sadness when he saw it. Too many times he’d seen the same look on guys’ faces when a relationship ended, or when their life choices didn’t work out the way they thought they should.

  He had to admit, though, the kid seemed determined. Despite the chill in the air and the rain pelting down, he didn’t give up. He trudged forward, step by step, even though the rain was virtually horizontal and hitting him straight in the face. It spoke volumes as far as Vic was concerned. The young man didn’t seem to be one to back down from a challenge, even if it was one he couldn’t possibly win.

  When Vic had driven on a bit farther, he was no longer able to see the young man in the mirror.

  That’s it. He’s gone now. Stop thinking about him. Just keep going.

  His conscience, however, demanded to know why he’d left the kid out there in the dark and stormy conditions without a coat. When another clap of thunder shook the car, Vic pulled over.

  Fuck it. He’d never be able to sleep, worrying about the kid. He’d see that expression in his dreams. I am such a soft touch. He decided to park on a side street and wait. Unless the kid huddled in a door, he’d have to pass right by where Vic sat. If he did decide to try to wait out the storm, Vic knew he’d go back to look for him. No way could he live with himself if he left the kid to his own devices.

  Then it struck him. I keep thinking of him as a kid, but I have no idea how old he is. He could have been in his midtwenties for all Vic knew. But there was something about him, a vulnerability that was evident despite the layers of animosity and anger.

  Or am I seeing more than really exists? At that point, Vic was unsure.

  He waited for fifteen minutes, more than enough time for the boy to have made it to where Vic sat. When he didn’t materialize, Vic turned around and headed back down the darkened street. When he saw the young man, he breathed a sigh of relief. He was still walking, struggling against the elements. Damn, that boy has a strong will. Vic had to admit, he liked that. It made a boy all the more gorgeous when they finally gave their submission. But this wasn’t the time or place to think about that. Right now the young man needed a ride, and Vic was determined he’d help the little monster, even if it went against his better judgment.

  Chapter Four

  ROB TRUDGED through the streets, scanning ahead for a taxi to the station. Every one that passed him was already occupied. He knew he’d end up sleeping on a bench when he got there, because the first train wouldn’t be departing until after six in the morning. Since he’d left the club, one question kept repeating over and over inside his head: Why the fuck did I bother to come to London at all? He hadn’t found anything here, and he probably never would.

  Lesson learned. No more rinse and repeat. Enough is enough.

  When a car pulled up alongside him, a tremor of fear rippled through him. The club was in a relatively quiet area, especially this late at night, and he was walking alone. Shit. Why didn’t I call for a taxi from the club? He already knew the answer to that one. He’d been in too much of a damn hurry to get out of there, thanks to that guy—

  The same guy who was now staring at him through the rolled-down window of the car.

  “Where are you going?” the man—Vic, that was his name, right?—asked. Except it was more of a demand than a question. Well, fuck him. Rob marched on, ignoring him, the wind driving the rain into his face. He was way beyond wet by now. Like a drowned rat would have been a better description. “Don’t make me ask a second time, boy.”

  Not your fucking boy! The words were on the tip of Rob’s tongue. Then he remembered Vic’s size. “I’m heading for Euston.”

  “Are you fucking kidding me? Do you know how far that is from here? Get in.”

  Again, not a request. The wind chose that moment to blow a heavy gust of rain right at him, and Rob was done. He opened the door and slid into the passenger seat. He buckled his seat belt and put his head back against the rest.

  Why did I bother to come here again? Shit. What a mess.

  The driver switched on his hazards, then held out a hand. Rob stared at it.

  “I’m Victor Prentiss. My friends call me Vic.”

  Rob sighed, then took Vic’s hand. He wasn’t surprised to see it dwarfed his own. “Rob. Robert Daniels.”

  “Nice to meet you. You don’t live in London?”

  Rob shook his head. “Manchester.”

  Vic lifted his eyebrows. “You’re a long way from home. Don’t you have a club nearer to you?”

  Rob wanted to snort. He could just imagine the look on Alex’s face if he was to walk through the doors of Collars & Cuffs. The sheer audacity of the thought made him laugh, but it was less mirthful and more hysterical. Why am I doing this to myself? What had he really hoped to gain?

  “My question amuses you?” Vic’s voice was low-pitched and rumbled out of him.

  Rob ran his fingers through his sopping-wet hair. Here he was, in a car with a man he didn’t know, and he was getting everything soaked. “No. Yes. I don’t know. Maybe.”

  “You know the trains don’t start running for hours yet.”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  Silence fell for a moment, and Rob’s stomach churned at the thought of what Vic would say next.

  “Well, you’ve got a couple of options here. First, I can drop you at the station and you can try to sleep there, assuming they’ll let you in. Second, you can let me drive you home.”

  “What—to Manchester? You’re joking.” Rob stared at him.

  Vic merely shrugged. “It’ll take a few hours, but I prefer that to leaving you out here alone. That leaves us with one last option. You can spend the night at my place. I have a guest bedroom, and it’s a lot safer than trying to get across London in the dark.”

  It took a second or two for Vic’s words to sink in. Then another to realize he’d spoken in earnest. He really would drive me back to Manchester. Rob had no clue why he should believe him, but the fact that he did was huge. The enormity of the offer had Rob’s head spinning. No one has ever done anything nice for me. Not really. His brother had run off and left him alone with their crazy mother and a father who was too indifferent to care. Alex hadn’t even bothered to invite Rob to his wedding. Not that Rob could blame him. He’d been so damned angry at Alex.

  Except that wasn’t quite true, was it? His anger had morphed into concern, but when he tried to share that, there had been unforeseen consequences. The police had questioned Leo, armed with their mother’s accusations of abuse, and then Alex had understandably cut most of the ties with his family.

  That was my fault. I did that.

  Tears trickled down his cheeks. I am such a fuckup. He ruined everything good he wanted in life by being a little prick. Anger and jealousy had driven him to create a schism between him and his brother. And now Rob was alone. His friends—not that they ever really were—kept ragging on Alex, and after a while, it got old. Alex hadn’t done anything wrong. All he’d done was find love.

  Love.

  What must it be like to love someone like that?

  When a heavy hand landed on Rob’s shoulder, he flinched, his breath hitching.

  “Sorry. You just looked like you were so lost. If you want to talk, I’ll be happy to listen.”

  Do I want to talk? Would Vic really understand how truly horrible Rob had been? Could he stand to see the censure in Vic’s expression that Rob saw every time he looked in the fucking mirror? How do you destroy everything and then expect to come back from it?


  The car still hadn’t moved, and Rob’s heart sank. Great. Vic was going to put him out too. But when Vic unbuckled his belt and pulled Rob closer, all the emotions that had been so perilously close to the surface finally burst free. For the first time in his life, Rob silently admitted he hated himself for what he’d done to Alex. For the part he’d played in Alex’s leaving. For the fact that he’d been such a bastard. Even if Alex had… no, that didn’t matter right now. It was beside the point. Rob was….

  Oh, hell. Rob didn’t deserve any kindness at all. Vic should put him out and forget he ever saw him.

  Except Rob hoped he wouldn’t.

  He clutched at Vic’s shirt and sobbed into his chest. Fuck it if Vic didn’t like it.

  Strong arms wrapped around him, and a deep yet unexpectedly gentle voice close to his ear whispered, “It’s okay, boy. Let it out. I have you.” Vic stroked the back of Rob’s head while he bawled like a baby.

  Rob hated himself. Everything he’d ever done, all the rotten crap he’d pulled. The threats. The blackmail. What kind of bastard was Rob Daniels?

  The tears wouldn’t stop pouring from him, no matter how much Rob wanted them to. He’d already offended the man who held him. Called him names, mocked him in front of his friends. And that same man was holding him, whispering that it was okay. How could that be? What kind of person wouldn’t hate him after what Rob had done?

  He fought to regain his composure, to put an end to the crying. For God’s sake, pull yourself together! Be a man!

  Rob drew back. “I’m sorry.” He sniffled, reaching for the handle of the car, but Vic’s grip on him tightened slightly.

  “Where are you going?”

  There was that frisson of fear again, but this time interlaced with overwhelming sadness. “You…. I just… I’m sorry, okay? You don’t have to be nice to me. After what I did, I don’t deserve it.”

  Vic didn’t loosen his grip. He tugged Rob closer, then said softly, “Sometimes those who feel they don’t deserve something are the ones who need it the most.”

  Rob stilled as he thought over Vic’s words. Who the fuck does he think he is? He doesn’t even know me. What the hell gave Vic the right to treat him as though he was one of those simpering femmes at the club? Rob stared at Vic, his fear and sorrow dissipating, to be replaced by irritation. He bristled at Vic’s arrogance and cocky attitude. Then he reconsidered. Vic’s attitude was so different from everyone else’s. They always ranged from cloying to not giving a shit. Vic seemed to simply not care what Rob thought.

  It should have pissed him off. The fact that it didn’t was… surprising.

  Tonight seems to be a night for that.

  “I’m not gay,” Rob blurted out, determined to get that out right away.

  Another casual shrug. “So? Do you want a medal?” Vic replied. “It’s not like I’m interested in you anyway.”

  His words stung, and it was on the tip of Rob’s tongue to demand to know why. Rob knew he wasn’t that bad. He’d had plenty of girls offer to warm his bed for a night. Most of whom he’d even taken up on it. Who the hell was this queer to say he wasn’t interested in Rob?

  To hell with it.

  He glared at Vic. “What’s wrong with me?” Somewhere in his head, a voice was yelling, Are you crazy? Do you want him to be interested? Shut. The. Fuck. Up.

  Vic quirked his eyebrows as he held up his hand and began to count off on his fingers. “One, you’re disrespectful. Two, you have a chip on your shoulder the size of the London Eye. Three, you need a haircut. Four—”

  Fuck, if every one of his comments didn’t tear through Rob. He put a hand up and ran it over his hair. Just above shoulder length, it wasn’t that long. He liked it that way. The girls said they found it sexy when it started to curl at the end as it got longer. But…. A knot in the pit of Rob’s stomach tightened. There hadn’t been a girl in a while. They always wanted cuddles after sex, and once Rob had gotten off, he really didn’t have any interest in doing anything else.

  What the hell was it that caused Vic’s words to sting him so badly?

  “I’m… I’m sorry,” Rob muttered.

  “For what?”

  For what indeed? How many things had Rob done in his life that he needed to find forgiveness for? He’d never really felt guilty about anything, but recently the memories of his actions threatened to undo him. And Rob knew this guy probably could see it all over his face. “All of it,” he admitted.

  Vic stared at him. “You’re sorry for all of it. Then why do you continue to do what you’re sorry for?”

  That raised Rob’s hackles. It was bad enough he pointed out Rob’s flaws, but now he sat here judging him? “You don’t know me!”

  Vic chuckled. “Oh, I think I know your kind pretty well. Arrogant little brat? Please. Boys like you are ten a penny. The only difference between them and you is they’re able to learn their place. You? You don’t give a shit about anyone but yourself.”

  “You don’t know me!” Rob spat again, only this time with less vehemence, because Vic had struck a nerve. Everything he said was true. But that didn’t mean he was acquainted with the circumstances under which Rob had grown up. How many times he’d—

  “Nor do I want to. I offered you a ride to the train. That’s it. Up to you if you want to take it. Otherwise I’ll drop you off here.”

  The threat to leave him on the street corner sucked the wind out of Rob’s sails. He peered out into the darkness. The night was bleak as rain continued to soak London. It was a night he’d experienced before. One where he couldn’t very well go out, so all he’d done was sit in his cramped flat and ruminate over how he’d gotten to this point in his life. Tonight he didn’t want to be alone. Better to sit in a warm car than in the train station overnight.

  “I’m sorry,” Rob said softly. He hoped Vic could hear the sincerity in his voice, hear the truth in his words.

  Apparently not.

  “So you’ve claimed, but you haven’t lost any of that attitude, have you? Even when you say you’re sorry, there’s an underlying anger to your tone, as if I’m the one at fault. How am I supposed to know you’re actually apologetic?”

  Is that what he hears? Is that really how I sound?

  “Because I… I….” Then he thought about it. How would he know? With the way Rob had behaved at the club, the fact that Vic was even talking to him instead of kicking his arse to the curb meant something. Didn’t it?

  “Go on,” Vic demanded. “Don’t stop there.”

  How the hell could he know, when Rob wasn’t sure himself? Recollections assailed him. The lies. The threats. The lonesomeness. The… abandonment. “I don’t know,” Rob wailed. “I have no idea how to prove to you how sorry I am. It’ll be better if I just go.”

  Rob grabbed the handle of the door. He had to get away from Vic. Away from the feelings that he engendered. And he would never go back to Secrets. Not again. Fuck them all.

  “Stop.”

  Vic’s voice barely rose above a whisper, but Rob knew it was a command. He stilled.

  “Put your seat belt back on,” Vic said.

  Rob’s hands worked as if they had a mind of their own as he obeyed Vic’s order and latched the belt across his chest. When Vic started the car, Rob froze. “Where are we going?”

  Without so much as a glance, Vic replied. “I’m going home. It’s up to you what you want. You can sleep in my spare room or out on the curb. Or I can just drop you at the train station. There clearly won’t be anything settled tonight, and I’m tired. So let me know what you decide.”

  The thoughts tumbled through Rob’s head.

  Fuck, but he’s an arrogant sod.

  Who is he to think that I would spend the night at his place? Fucker would probably try to have sex with me.

  Like I’d agree to that.

  The wind buffeted the car, and just like that, Rob came to his senses. He didn’t want to be out in that shit. And the staff who manned the train station might not even
let him sleep there until the morning when he could get home. Fuck.

  “You won’t….” He swallowed hard.

  “I won’t touch you,” Vic promised. “In the morning, I’ll take you to the train so you can go home.”

  It all sounded so easy.

  “How do you know I won’t hurt you?” Rob demanded.

  The corner of Vic’s mouth curled upward. God, Rob hated that smirk. What was more, he loathed the fact that Vic seemed to know him so well, even though they’d only just met.

  Am I really that transparent? The thought dismayed him.

  “Can I…?” Rob couldn’t get the words out. To ask would be showing weakness, and Rob wasn’t weak. He wasn’t.

  “What?” Vic asked.

  Rob breathed more evenly. “Nothing. Never mind.”

  There was a moment’s pause. “Very well. I’ll drop you at the station.” Vic put the car into gear and pulled away from the curb.

  Fuck it. He couldn’t do this. Sit in the station for hours with nothing to do? Alone? Again?

  It was now or never.

  “Can I stay the night at your place?” The words came out in a rush.

  Vic smiled. “Yes, you may. We’ll be there in about ten minutes. When we arrive, I’ll make us a cuppa, then show you to your room.”

  They lapsed into silence as Vic drove through the wet streets, the rain still bouncing off the windscreen.

  Rob couldn’t believe he’d just asked to spend the night. What was I thinking? Then he reasoned that he’d be warm, safe, and, more importantly, not alone.

  That’s the only reason I asked.

  It had absolutely nothing to do with Vic.

  It didn’t.

  Chapter Five

  VIC HEADED for his place, wondering what was going through Rob’s mind. The one thing he’d noticed was that Rob’s emotions showed clearly on his face. His anger was a sight to behold—the flinty eyes, the tightness in his expression, the flushed face—but there were also others mixed in with it. He wasn’t sure Rob had control over his feelings at all.